There's
ample evidence
that the gaze of others is highly compelling: We're more attuned to
faces whose eyes are trained upon us than faces whose eyes are looking
elsewhere.
Even newborns pay more attention to faces whose eyes are gazing directly at them than to faces whose eyes are looking off in the distance.
You probably already know this if you've ever been trying to read in a
coffee shop or on a subway but suddenly "feel" the stare of a stranger
distracting you from your text. (You look up, look back at them, and
they usually look away. Unless they're trying to hit on you, in which
case they ask what you're reading, whether you come here often, what
you're drinking, or where you're headed next, and you spend the next 45
minutes trying to end the conversation so you can finish that chapter.)
Thus the impact of eyes looking at us upon our
concentration
can work for or against our ability to stay focused. In many
cases, us-directed gazes boost our ability to process information
related to faces (i.e.,
concluding that a person is male or female) and
enhance our memories of whoever was looking at us. Eye contact can also improve learning in general: A
classic study by James P. Otteson
and colleagues in 1980 found that young students whose teachers made
eye contact with them during lectures had improved recall of verbal
material after the class.
When, however, we're trying to focus on something other than a
person's face or the information they're trying to deliver by talking to
us with an intent stare, eye contact
can distract us from non-facial information processing tasks (like that book you were trying to read...).
Other people's eyes also affect our self-awareness: Several studies
have demonstrated that feeling looked at inclines people to become more
attuned to their own body's physiological responses (heart rate,
sweating, and breathing) as well as how they might be perceived by
others (e.g., "Does s/he notice I have a toothpaste stain on my
t-shirt?"). Mere images of eyes (think: paintings or pictures rather
than an actual, IRL person) have even been found to make us
act in a prosocial or reputable manner — and such images
trump reminders that peers are present and/or will be judging us.
Additionally, we like people (
and animated characters) more when these others appear to be engaging us with eye contact. Provided the eye contact is
offered in a non-threatening situation, of course. Being gazed at by a potential mate has also been found
to increase our attraction to them,
so long as that potential mate also looks relatively happy (and/or we
really weren't trying to tune out the world and focus on that next great
American novel.)
In a recent review of the many powerful effects eye contact has on our behavior,
cognition,
and arousal levels, researchers Laurence Conty, Nathalie George, and
Jari K. Hietanen explain that "direct gaze has the power to enhance the
experience that the information present in the situation is strongly
related to one's own person." They believe that the self-referential
information processing brought about by feeling looked at "acts as an
associative 'glue' for perception,
memory, and
decision-making."
This can serve to enhance memory and make us behave more
altruistically, they explain, by heightening "the salience of concerns
about being a target for others' social evaluation and, consequently,
concerns about one's self-reputation." (We do the right thing because we
assume we're going to be judged, we're being watched, or, possibly, we
just like the person whose gaze looks warm and we'd like to be nice to
them out of sheer
gratitude for having been favorably noticed.)
The researchers believe that eye contact can and should be used "for
therapeutic purposes." They note "that the use of eye contact during
therapeutic processes
increase the patient’s appraisal
of the therapist’s interpersonal skills and effectiveness." Given eye
contact's ability to enhance memory for specific context-specific
material, they have a hunch eye contact may be particularly helpful for
people with
Alzheimer's Disease:
Alzheimer's Disease (AD), they write, "is characterized not only by
memory impairments, but also by psycho-behavioral anomalies that
necessarily appear at some point of the disease and impoverish the
patient’s relations with others. Interestingly, the processing of eye
direction as well as eye contact behavior
seems to be preserved
in patients with AD. This predicts that the W.E. [Watching
Eyes] effects may also be preserved and may therefore be stimulated to
improve the quality of social exchange of these patients."
Precautions should be observed, however, in subjecting people with
certain diagnoses to excessive eye contact. The gaze of others
can trigger intense feelings of shame and other negative self-evaluations in socially anxious individuals, for instance. And people who meet the criteria for
borderline personality disorder are
more apt to perceive negative emotions
in others' facial expressions, potentially inclining them to interpret a
kind or innocuous gaze as a threatening (or judgmental) stare.
Additional work suggests that when being confronted or challenged by
someone, eye contact can serve to enhance perceived aggression. In
fact,
a study investigating the role of eye contact in persuasion found
that direct gazes impaired actors' ability to change others' opinions,
contrary to the assumption that eye contact always works in favor of
increasing warm feelings between two people.
Research has shown that most people are comfortable with
approximately 3.2 seconds of eye contact from a stranger — more if that stranger seems trustworthy; even more if that stranger later becomes a friend.
All in all, eye contact can have a memory-boosting, prosocial, and
stimulating effect. As long, of course, as its wanted by the person
being looked at. So if you're trying to use eye contact to your
advantage, pay attention to the cues coming from the person you're
staring at: If they're returning your gaze, lighting up, becoming more
talkative, and straightening their posture or relaxing as you look into
their eyes, you're doing great. But if they're shying away, acting
nervous, looking annoyed, or they keep trying to turn their attention
back towards the book you just distracted them from reading, it's
probably a good idea to look (and possibly, go) away.